the list could go on forever

there are some things that, i believe, we should eliminate from our society. these are merely items or concepts. actually, the best thing to eliminate would be people [see: george carlin, god rest his soul (tee hee). that one was for you george, even though you can't hear me or read this]. i'm not realistically saying that we literally need to eliminate (destroy, kill, etc.) people from our country/world, though we all are allowed to have fantasies.. i am not a violent man; i swear. i think my fan base (just add "base"!) knows where i'm coming from over here.

--the penny
we've all probably heard this before, but i've actually been on this kick for about 20 years or so. hmmm.. business idea #1: do not invest in something that is certain to lose money. sounds easy, right? however, it costs more than a penny to make a penny.. and (drumroll, please), guess how these pennies from heaven are funded.. you and i, my dearies. just saw a few 1-cent pieces dated 2008.

--cliches & other overused/stupid sayings (i had a list a mile long a few days ago, but i'm blanking at the moment; i'll think of more and add them. i'm taking suggestions)
-what have you
-expect the unexpected
-only time will tell
-the extreme overuse/misuse of the word literally
-each and every (so not just each one but every one? right..)

--the ability to come out of retirement (directed primarily at professional athletes)
roger "HGH" clemens, brett favre, we know that neither of you have the ability to do anything else other than play your games. we also know that you are two of the best to play them and that you still have excellent ability. we know that you are aging and don't want to (none of us do). we know that you still have a dedicated fan base (as i do) who wants to see you play, no matter how old you are. we know that you can still make a ludicrous amount of money for playing a freakin game. all understood.

quitting a sports career and then quitting retirement is no surprise or cool thing anymore. do something philanthropical. it's hard to believe that the only thing that gives you enough satisfaction is playing. with the disgusting amount of money and free time you have, do some good! here's one: spend time with your kids.

i wonder about athletes such as tennis #1 justine henin-hardenne who just retired while at the top of the game. and annika sorenstam (what up, annika!), also one of the top stars, and the greatest female golfer of all-time. will they stay in retirement? only time will tell (ha!). annika left the door open to playing more tournaments in the future. but golf is a little different in that one can choose a few certain events each year and also remain physically able to play later in life.

i admire athletes who can leave at the top of their game (e.g. barry sanders) and move on and accept that it was a wise decision. i myself officially hung up my boots years ago. still retired.

--weatherpeople's precipitation predictions (i actually don't have anything against these guys)
sure, give us a general idea what the temperature will be, if we are in the certain path of a hurricane. just stop telling me there is a 25% or 60% chance of rain or snow or whatever. many times, these meterologists (sorry for calling you "weatherpeople") are incorrect. ok, no big deal. i don't hold it against them when they are wrong; i'm sure one day i could be wrong about something.

pay me half as much as a meterologist makes and i can take a minute or two each day to look at some fancy instruments and tell the public that there's a 50-50 chance of rain or no rain. either it will rain, or it won't. right? sounds like 50% to me. oh, also-- there's a 50% chance i'm talking out of my arse. either i am or i'm not. good thing for me that my arse is fluent in english.

yippie-kiyay,
mr. falcon